This is my entry to Qurator's "Monday Missions entry".
I wish I had something to write about if it comes to "Valentine's Day".
It is no custom to celebrate it in the Netherlands so most people don't.
The first time I heard about its existence was over 40 years ago. I read a short article in the teenager's magazine of my sister as I stood on the schoolyard.
They only mentioned it was about " sending a card anonymous to the one you love."
That was not really of my interest neither was having a relationship. It was not that boys didn't like me but my home situation wasn't one that you like to share with the outside world.
Celebrations at our house were seldom a celebration.
It was more about being punished for feeling happy, beaten up and next you had to smile to the visitors or say "thank you" for the gift you hated.
"You cannot give what you don't have", they say.
I have no idea who "they" are but the thing I know is that if you start living by what others say or think it is not motivating to give it a try, live at all.
Valentine's day is not important to me.
This day is not an exception. I feel the same about Mother's day. If you need a special day to prove you care or love someone or are grateful there's something wrong with you!
If you make scenes because the love of your life didn't buy you what you had in mind you have a serious problem, so have you if you get into debts to buy something.
How many days, next to your birthday, do you need to fill that empty hole inside of you?
To receive proof someone cares about you?
Many of you celebrate birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Eve, Eastern or you have Ramadan and big parties afterward, wedding parties that do not come to an end. You stuff yourself, are surrounded by people who care about you, like you, pamper you but you are not happy, not even satisfied!
I wonder how come so many eyes are cried off and the empty feeling holding hands with dissatisfaction remains even after being pampered.
Valentine's Day is not the day in the year to prove you love someone.
Each day of the year you have to work on a relationship. No matter if it is with your parents, partner, children, friends, the neighbors or here.
Ask yourself what your life would look like without Valentine's Day, a love of your life, a person that provides in your needs, if that gift is really necessary or a hug, good laugh, quality time together and a friend for life, a bond through the year do not proof more.
Do we celebrate?
To us birthdays are important. Especially a child's birthday. It is good to know people are happy you exist, are around. It is healthy to be in the center of attention once a year. It is not something meant for the rich and famous only. Once a year say what you like to eat, blow the candles on your pie... even if there's no birthday party with visitors.
We celebrate December 5th and save the whole year to realize it.
It's still a celebration with the entire family and we make a part of the presents ourselves.
Christmas we do not celebrate.
We are not Christians. No presents, no dinner, no visits, no visitors. It's pajamas day and movie time.
Eastern with us is good for the eggs.
No egg search any longer but a chocolate egg is in it for each of us.
Valentine's day 2020?
It will not be special. There's no need to. We stay with those we like most. In this case me and my children. No stress from outsiders, no expectations and no unsatisfied faces either.
Might be I buy my children something or I bake a cake. I have enough in stock to make something they like or we eat the "mergpijpen" I saved for brightening up a day once in a while, just to give them the bit extra they deserve. My children do not have an easy life but at least they are not spoiled, are satisfied and happy with what you give them. Candies, sweeties, cookies, potato chips, junk food are no part of our groceries. They still say "thank you" if I give them some tea or something to eat.
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