uhfftkxoxf


The most important insights I got from the books were variations on this:
"In healthy intimate relationships we do not seek more than 25 percent of our nurturance from a partner; we learn to find the rest within ourselves.”
An intimate relationship is an important part of a full life but only a part and we should develop and maintain internal resources to go it alone. And if you do have those internal resources, you probably won't have to go it alone.
I've seen a similar sentiment phrased more harshly as advice to someone considering a future divorce and wondering how to prepare; "Your stay plan is your go plan" .
Meaning; you should be working to have your act together in all aspects of your life regardless of your relationship status. If you are in a relationship it benefits your partner, but it benefits you regardless.
The book has some decent exercises, personally I'm fond of buddhist style brahmavihara meditations to develop emotional resilience.


Comments 0