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The not setting up the guest bed is a brilliant beginning.
Getting on the same page as your spouse is a good idea, too. If you read some parenting books together and have some in- depth discussions about how you want to raise your baby your mil will have a lot less room to cause trouble. Sometimes I think partners who agree with their moms on stupid crap do so because they're ignorant of current childcare best practices. Arm your husband with knowledge.
Maybe talk about boundaries with him as well? It's your home as much as it is his. You deserve to come home and unwind before the inlaws invade.
You're probably going to be blamed if he starts standing up to her. You might consider embracing it. If she's a little scared of you it may be easier to stand up to her in the moment.
You'll never understand what her motivations are for most of her games. Your mind just doesn't work that way. Settle for putting your family above her outraged and/or hurt feelings. You're going to discover your inner mama bear and it'll be easier.
Also, always trust your gut. ALWAYS.


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