Today my lungs got cleared a bit with its fluids, so the "Rales" as they call it or that gurgling sound got diminished. Usually I get it come near dialysis day when I am waterlogged already and it is hard to breathe at that point which it feels like you are drowning where exhale is as hard as inhale.
Sometimes when I go for my dialysis treatment I would ask for the nurses to take some extra water from my system because dialysis doesn't take out toxins only but also extra fluid from the patient's body. We do not excrete urine anymore so any fluid intake we do just builds-up to the body and only through dialysis those extra water from the body would be taken out.
So I would ask the nurses from time to time to remove or set the machine to take extra water but unfortunately they just believe that I could not tolerate getting removed with not more than 3.6 Kilos. So I would not have to load up with that amount otherwise I will get a build-up of water which would lead to the things that I am complaining about like breathlessness and overall feeling of ill.
But fortunately today I went home lighter than I did the last time I had my session and it truly does makes a big difference in my well-being . But I still feel that I have extra water because I am easily get filled with water which should not be the case.
That is why with just maybe five full meals I am already filled to the brim then breathlessness kicks in. It is the reason that I could not eat much so I am sometimes eating lightly two times a day. Well it is good for me not to eat much but I have to fulfill my calorie requirements which isn't happening no matter how I tried.
So I am always thinking some ways to add some mass in my body and I am considering those drinks that muscle builders takes but without lactose as my guts revolutionize on me if I do.
I just have to consider the phosphates in those drinks so I just have to take more phosphate binder in that regard and it will mean more expense so it would then be set-aside and I have to just consider it as a plan since I have to prioritize my Parathyroid medicine.
Anyway today is somewhat a mix of good and bad because of my body pains that I do not know if it would get worse or subside again. Now I just have to take some pain medication because it is hard to bear the pain which is complex and coupled with weakness. I do not know if when would my body will give up, it has been 17 years and I do not know if my longevity is a curse for me because of the hardship that I am experiencing night and day. May God have mercy on me.